Britany Robinson wrote an article for the Washington Post describing her abortion experience and why she felt so lonely. Our director, Emily Brown, decided to reach out to Britany through this open letter:
I am so sorry to hear all that you have been through. I cannot imagine the shock of discovering an unplanned pregnancy, then going through the traumatic experience of an abortion, and losing the one person you thought you could trust.
When you recounted your experience on the abortion table, I couldn’t help but cringe. I could feel the physical and mental pain in your words. The line that struck me the most was how you were “hoping one type of pain might distract from another.” The physical pain of having your child killed must have been immense, and I cannot begin to understand how the emotional pain feels.
After your abortion procedure, you needed a loving shoulder to lean on and I’m sorry your boyfriend was not there for you. I’m sure you still have many days when the pain of abortion comes back to haunt you.
I want you to know that you are not alone!
Abortion might seem like a solution because the thought of raising a child may seem overwhelming and impossible. However, women like yourself who discover an unplanned pregnancy are not alone. There are numerous homes for pregnant mothers—places that would have given you a warm home, resources, and care for you and your child. There are crisis pregnancy centers that would have helped walk you through your options. There are groups, like ours, who will always personally reach out to expectant mothers like you and then guide you to someone who can physically help you. There is the beautiful option of placing your child with a loving family through adoption. And there are ministries such as Rachel’s Vineyard that help women heal after an abortion.
I’m sorry you felt so alone. This is one of the biggest problems with unplanned pregnancies in our society. Women feel ashamed, scared, and alone during a desperate time of need. The last thing they need is to feel loneliness!
As you stated, women who experience abortion “grieve quietly.” Women grieve and feel tormented because they know the decision to abort is much more than “ending a pregnancy.” The decision to end the life of your child is never empowering. It is crushing.
Some people look at the #ShoutYourAbortion campaign as a sign of empowerment, as a way women who have had abortions can unite and not feel so alone. However, what that campaign has really displayed is the true hurt in women. It has displayed how desperate for love and reassurance women are after the trauma of abortion. It shows we are a society full of hurting women in need of love.
Abortion hurt you. The loss of your child caused you pain. But you are not alone. You have a whole host of compassionate people, including myself, ready to help you heal after your abortion. I encourage you to reach out to Rachel’s Vineyard or myself at firstname.lastname@example.org. You are never alone!